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July 26th, 2010 | Author: BREAKING NEWS | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags:

PK lacks vision.

MM Lee as Moses of 2010, needs floods in Orchard Road, so he could do God’s will in parting the Orchard River and leading the people to the promised Casinos!

And PM Lee is David with the catapult. Poor Gohliath.

If you guys could figure out who SM Goh is, do let me know.

Harry Wow Wild Cats, meow meow…

July 23rd, 2010 | Author: Andrew PK Yap | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags: ,

Singapore, 23 July 2010

They sent billions to their rescue and lost billions in the process.

When Singapore is inundated, the excuses start to flow:

“MM Lee says no amount of engineering can prevent flooding. Channel News Asia”

“Singapore Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong said it would be very costly to keep the city state flood-free after the country was hit by two flash floods this month, including one in the prime Orchard Road shopping district. (Reporting by Singapore Newsroom -June 27 (Reuters)”

The one that heads the organisation rushing to Merrill and Citibank rescue in the USA happens to be the daughter in law / wife and the ones making the excuses happen to be the father in law / wife… oops, husband, respectively.

Go figure.

July 13th, 2010 | Author: Andrew PK Yap | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags: , , , ,

Singapore, July 13th 2010

I say let him win without contest.

Since he is so desperate to win absolute control that he was willing to do such despicable acts against his opponents; why bother now when he is breathing his last.

It is clear for all to see that his family suffered the retribution for the inhuman acts the man committed.

Let the curses his family suffers be a warning to all and let the bad karma count as justice and move on.

What I don’t get is why the man continues to heap more evil on his own head promoting the casinos.

I can only guess that some people do not believe in retribution and or karma even when it plays out in his own family.

July 12th, 2010 | Author: BREAKING NEWS | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags:

Honestly, we “PAP smear” don’t think Thia Khiang got the guts to send a team to contest our IPman MM Lee at Tanjong Pagar. His Weng Chun skills will bring down your gu-niangs easily.

If you dare to send in the scouts, I will “Chop!!!”. =D

Harry from ESBN
and the wow wild cats

July 8th, 2010 | Author: BREAKING NEWS | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags:

This GE might be our Our MM Lee’s finale GE in his entire life. He is probably hoping that there is some sort of challenge mounted when the time comes. So Thia Khiang, last election, you sent your boy scouts to AMK, this round why don’t you try Tanjong Pagar instead?

Who knows, it might be a draw followed by penalty shootout!

=)
Harry from ESBN
and the wow wild cats

July 1st, 2010 | Author: BREAKING NEWS | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags:

As there has been a common spread that the GE could be in December 2010 as a result of that @#$ BN’s prediction, our Prime Minister is duely considering delaying it till 2011 unfolds. It might perhaps just be 2 Jan 2011 for Polling Day afterall, just to prove a point. Nevertheless, GE is near and the MPs and grassroots are all working round the clock. Ah Mee, the returning officer is a famous man now, in addition to his achievement in LTA. The instant noodles business is suddenly hot!

Let’s brace for an all exciting GE2011 ya! You know who to vote for, don’t you?

Btw, all ladies, remember to go for PAP smear.

=)
Harry from ESBN
and the wow wild cats

June 27th, 2010 | Author: BREAKING NEWS | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags:

Our revered MM Lee rated himself A or A- at the 37th annual Association of Banks in Singapore (ABS) dinner last friday for shaping the financial industry with the late Dr Goh Keng Swee.

He was too modest.

IMHO, he deserves an A+ just by coming out with a theory that Singapore needs only two banks. By right DBS suffice, and it would be a good monopoly for any businesses. But because banking is not any ordinary business and funds need to be circulated, at least two banks need to exist. May God bless him for striving hard to feed the three classes that he created. His one party-two banks-three classes ideology is indeed wise and benefacting.

I would like to add on to that …. four senior ministers playing Cardinals role to support the Prime Minister. That shall make the establishment almost impregnable.

We have hope indeed.

Harry from ESBN
and the wow wild cats

June 23rd, 2010 | Author: BREAKING NEWS | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags:

MM Lee

Our Minister Mentor is healthy and ready for the GE! Yeah!!!

Harry from ESBN

June 22nd, 2010 | Author: Andrew PK Yap | Categories: Humour and Satire | Tags: , , , , ,

Singapore 23 June 2003

The economic stimulus programs started at the height of the great recession either has ended or are ending soon and as a result, the economic news that comes out of the USA is mostly bad or disappointing.

China is supposed to take up the slack, the slowdown in demand in the US. Indeed, she has, to a certain extent. The trade figures for March shows a deficit of almost US$8 billion. It is usually, almost always, in surplus.

It is becoming clear that the amount of money the communist government of China printed to counter the great recession is causing inflationary pressures. They printed vastly more than what the Americans did, the British did and the Europeans printed.

When the Euro currency tanked against the US dollar and because the Chinese pegged the renminbi to the US dollar, the Chinese yuan strengthened and exports to the EU, one can imagine fell.

In a desperate move, the communist government decides to widen the exchange rate band for the yuan and while in a knee jerk reaction the yuan strengthened against the US dollar, the likelihood is for the yuan to weaken against the Euro after the G20 meet.

China is becoming a bigger economy and the test will soon come whether the Chinese despots can run an economy that is so much bigger and so much more complex compared to when Deng opened up the country 30 years ago.

Ho Jinx is reportedly participating in the Great Chinese bank IPO (Agricultural bank of China). The track record of Temasek’s overseas investments, think Shin Corp, Merrill Lynch, Barclays to name a few is so jinxed, one cannot help but wonder if this is the beginning of the GREAT ECONOMIC COLLAPSE of CHINA.

Singapore, Friday June 18 2010

One of the expected consequences of strong economic growth is inflation. You would then assume that inflation would be tame when the growth is anemic.

An economic depression would lead to deflation. Other causes as in the case with Japan, property prices fell after the bubble burst and caused a decade of deflation.

In the USA and Europe, the present growth is tentative at best and the fear is of a double dip recession after the recent great recession. A double dip might lead to a full-blown depression. You would expect that to lead to deflation.

Sure, printing more money would lead to inflation, and that would counter the deflationary pressures if the affected governments see a double dip on the way. So why did the Japanese government not print yen to get out of the deflation?

The simple answer is that doing that would bring on other problems. If there were a run on the currency, the “other problems” would cause more harm than deflationary pressures. Think Zimbabwe.

Stoically, the many Japanese governments, or more accurately, the civil servants, simply refused to do that and that is why you have “many” changes of government because they are seen to be unable to address the “poor economic growth” issue.

You might correctly argue that the USA and the UK governments printed money (quantitatively eased) in the recent great recession. They apparently are getting away with it, so far.

Some would argue that they were “responsible” in their easing and it was a limited and controlled easing. Obviously, it will all spiral out of control if we were to see a double dip that might lead to a depression and they decide to print more and more.

What is happening in China now, at the moment, is the, as far as I can see, increases in wage demands. It seems like it will spiral out of control, as it would seem most bizarre for a communist government not to support the workers.

Because it is not democratic, the communist regime would face unimaginable consequences, if they are seen to be abandoning the (to put it in the words of the Swedish chairperson of British Petroleum) “small” people.

Property price increases leading to wage increases which lead to more property price increases, which lead to prices of everything else to increase, which lead to wage increases…. how can the communist regime stop it?

Wage increases in China. How can you stop that in a country, when if you cannot take industrial action, you, one by one, jump off the roof of the factory (in the case of Foxcon) to press your case.

So what does this all mean? When will it start to affect the markets? So what will happen to the commodity, financial, stock, foreign exchange markets? That is something you have to discuss with your personal financial advisor.

Make sure you have a good one that makes you money, protect your wealth, instead of losing it all for you.

The 2008 financial market crash was due to losses the banks suffered because of the sub prime loans tied to the Credit Default Swaps.

The 2010 market crisis was due to the “maybe” the PIGS will default.

“Maybe” the Europeans fixing the PIGS crisis will “maybe” derail the global economic recovery.

The markets dropped because of all these “maybe”/s.

“Maybe” its just all bull-sh!t

“Maybe” it is just time for the markets to have a healthy correction.

Edited 25th May 2010 to add: Out of the blue a report comes out that North Korea is preparing for war and send the markets tumbling.

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The problem with the European Community is that some members are heavily indebted. Greece is insolvent. She cannot pay the money she borrowed without borrowing more, with virtually nobody willing to lend. The European Community has to do it to lend Greece the money; and maybe Portugal, Ireland, Spain.

Portugal Ireland Greece Spain, PIGS.

Just let Greece go bankrupt and let them default on their loans; is that possible? If that happens, a big bank that loaned them money might go under. Think Lehman brothers.

When the USA poured money into the system, ostensibly by printing money (so did the UK) it solved the problem to a certain extent.

The European Community cannot do it, print money to rescue the PIGS, for the currency does not serve only one country. When the USA prints, the benefits or consequences go to one country. Not so the EU.

People want to know whether it is feasible to ask the Germans and the Italians, for example to bail out Greece. Hey, even brothers living under the same roof find it hard to bail each other out.

What is worse is that there does not seem to be a long-term solution for Greece that would ensure the lenders would get their money back.

What then, give them all the one trillion?

Forget about the Germans and the Italians for a bit and we see that in Greece itself, the beneficiary, there are riots against the plan.

Sometimes, the fear is worse than the reality but in this case, the reality would cause a global depression.

The fear that it will fail and go awry has already caused a minor credit squeeze. The markets are plunging, wiping out trillions from the system.

It is fast becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Then there is China. Watch this space.

Edited to add: Spain announced that they will make deep budget cuts (there is hope yet)

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It is alarming that the Europeans choose to describe the sharp falls in the markets as “the work of wolfpacks”.

That is like saying you are ill because of the cough when you are coughing because you have tuberculosis. The patient can eventually die if the he only takes cough suppressants without dealing with the tuberculosis,

While the coughing might stop for a time, it will soon become worse and blood will start spewing out with every cough.

Sure, they have come up with a trillion dollars worth to suppress the “cough”. Do you read anything about a plan to cure the TB?

That you did not is not necessarily negligence on the part of the European Community leaders, and could very well be, and very likely is, they cannot think of a solution. They hope that economic recovery worldwide will eventually solve the problems.

In a world where information flows instantly everywhere, people will react in their best interest today that which they think will happen tomorrow.

There is a serious loss of confidence worldwide. Stock and commodity prices go up because people have confidence. People have confidence because the data they have forecasting the future looks rosy. (In the case of hyperinflation, stock and commodity prices go up because of a loss of confidence in money).

Looking at the data, people are noticing that there are indeed very serious risks going forward, for the world economy.

The world is now stuck in a very small room with nowhere to turn. You hit a wall every way you go. Up, down, right, left, forward, backwards all have serious consequences.

Who would want to put their money into the markets in such a scenario? What is worse though, is that holding on to cash might not be in your best interest. There is a very real possibility that the value of money will drop and depending on what currency you hold, the drop can be very serious.

In such scenarios, it used to be that the smart money gets out first. Nowadays, people everywhere are smart because everyone has the information (there are idiots that do not read and cannot understand even when the information is available, but these are the exceptions and the rest very likely do not have any money to influence the outcome anyway.)

Therefore, everyone gets out at the same time and you have a market crisis. Watch this space.

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May 10th, 2010 | Author: BREAKING NEWS | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags:

ESBNHi Guys,

This is Harry reporting live on ESBN. As you all have known, BN has retired from the scene and I, Harry will be reporting from the PAP’s perspective.

Do not mistake me Harry from our MM Harry Lee. I am just Harry. You may call me Harry from ESBN if you like.

We are very glad to hear that Kenneth, son of the late Jeya, has decided to call off the alliance with See Tong. Poor See Tong, so old already Po East Pa West go Bishan some more, at the end leaked out some stupid documents to the press resulting in Kenneth not wanting to collaborate.

You see, fellow Singaporeans, how can we trust the oppositions? With calibres of such, you might as well just rely on the NCMPs! See Tong is getting old. Kenneth is inexperienced. Thia Khiang that Teochew Boy being in his fourth term in parliament has yet to do something great, you know?

That only means one thing. Just like Morinho that special one of Internazionale, our MM Harry is the special one for Singapore! Choose him. Vote him. Kiss him! You will never regret your choice.

Remember, this Election, probably in Dec 2010, the choice is special.

=O
Harry from ESBN

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May 9th, 2010 | Author: Andrew PK Yap | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags:

QUOTE
Death penalty, a trade-off
05:55 AM May 10, 2010
SINGAPORE – The mandatory death penalty for serious drug offences here is a “trade-off” the Government makes to protect “thousands of lives” that may be ruined if drugs were freely available, Law Minister and Second Home Affairs Minister K Shanmugam said yesterday.

UNQUOTE

Never forget that these people are greedy for your money and if people’s lives are ruined, thousands of people’s lives are ruin…. to them its just collateral damage in their money grabbing spree.

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April 27th, 2010 | Author: Andrew PK Yap | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags:

For no apparent reason, the In-Vehicle-Unit failed as I went pass the ERP. I took out the card and reinserted it a few times and it worked. It worked for a few days and again for no apparent reason it failed at another gantry. Again I removed and reinserted the cash card a few times until it work (as evidenced by the green light).

It has worked since then until the time of writing.

As expected when it comes to collecting the people’s hard earned money for among other things, their relatives and cronies to gamble with and lose massive amounts to foreign entities, two letters demanding payment came.

With the rapid advancement of science and technology, they continue to use the ancient unreliable devices.

I considered writing in to make an appeal for how is it my fault? But then I decided that it is just too much trouble and simply curse them and paid up.

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Interview_with_the_vampire

Interviewer: Good afternoon, Dr Ionescu

Dr Silviu: Good afternoon to you

Interviewer: I am surprised you wanted to do it in the afternoon although we requested an interview in the evening. Do you not have a problem with sunlight anymore?

Dr Silviu: My son, do you not think that after so many hundreds of years, I would have found a “cure”?

Interviewer: Yes, I see. Can you tell us what you were doing in Singapore?

Dr Silviu: Well I was getting bored with European blood. I needed a change in the menu, if you will.

Interviewer: In Singapore, you did not hit those people with your car for their blood did you? You suck the blood from people’s neck don’t you?

Dr Silviu: In bygone days, yes. The problem is, that killed them (ed: when he sucked their blood from his victim’s neck) and caused me many problems with the police.

Interviewer: So you get your supply from the blood bank?

Dr Silviu: No, no, no. I don’t drink stale blood. I like to drink it as it flows out of  the human body.

Interviewer: I don’t understand, how then do you do it now?

Dr Silviu: Think, my boy, think. Women, as you know, every month….

Interviewer: Please excuse me while I suppress my urge to puke.

Dr Silviu: ah… understandable. It’s an acquired taste.

Interviewer: So why then did you knock down those people in Singapore with your car?

Dr Silviu: It was their fault. They did not look out for oncoming vehicles just because it was a proper pedestrian crossing. I hope I have done Singaporeans a service by teaching them a valuable lesson to be careful even at pedestrian crossings. You have no idea how many are killed at pedestrian crossings in Singapore.

Interviewer: So you were giving the country an object lesson, so to speak?

Dr Silviu: Exactly, and yet the authorities there are coming after me no end. Ingrates, Singaporeans. What is a couple of people dying in order to teach the rest a valuable lesson?

Interviewer: One last question. The honorific “Dr” in front of your name does not stand for “doctor” does it?

Dr Silviu: Right. Knowing that I come from Romania, they should have guessed what the “Dr” stands for.

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March 29th, 2010 | Author: BREAKING NEWS | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags:

30 March 2010

~ BREAKING NEWS ~

Last election, BN took the side of the Opposition.

Not this election.

This time, BN shall report from the perspective of the Papa Lee & Co.

With effect from now. Amen.

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March 13th, 2010 | Author: siew91 | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags:

The recent parliamentary sessions clearly showed that we, the lesser mortals, and the PAP MP/ministers live in entirely different worlds.

We are worried about bread and butter issues as the influx of foreign workers pushes us out of jobs as well as HDB flats. The elite MP and million-dollar ministers, on the other hand, are indulging in extravagance such as secrets to healthy hair, dressing styles and origins of local cuisine.

There is no harm to living in different worlds so long as it doesn’t affect the MPs’ responsibility to their constituents.

MP are supposed to be the elected representatives of the people and must be able to feel our pain in order to speak up for us effectively. Unfortunately, the current parliament sittings clearly show that they don’t feel our pain at all!

Parliament proceedings are the highest political forums in any democracy practicing country. Its members are supposed to, among other things, debate on the effectiveness and weaknesses in government policies and their implementation. While the elite PAP MP have never been serious critics of government policies, they are now beginning to degrade parliament proceedings into a social gathering of the rich tai tai.

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March 13th, 2010 | Author: Andrew PK Yap | Categories: Columns and Commentary | Tags:

March 13, 2010 Singapore

Just look at Hilary Clinton and more recently, Elin Woods.

They both kept a distance, from their philandering husbands until everything settled down.

Mrs Jack Neo on the other hand reportedly said, “It’s no big deal” and subsequently, fainted at a press conference.

What is this? Is she trying to add fuel to the fire? Even if she thinks it is “No big deal” for her  husband to score with women half her age, must she say it out loud?

She invited ire from the scores of women that do not share her sentiments. She lost whatever compassion anyone felt for her.

Just butt out, “pretend” to be angry like Hilary and Elin and after a decent period of time, ”forgive” her husband and the sooner it will all go away.

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